Best Collection Of Funny One Line Jokes And Puns will Make You Laugh

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Some of the best jokes aren’t long or complicated at all. Sometimes the funniest jokes are as simple as a phrase.

Sure, knock-knock jokes are classic, but if your little one or friends are impatient types, one-liners may be more their speed. 

This list is bound to make you laugh…or at the very least smile! Read on and add these one-liner jokes to your collection so you can rattle them off at your next funny family get-together.

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory: all I did was take a day off!

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory: all I did was take a day off!

Money talks: mine always says is goodbye.

Money talks: mine always says is goodbye.

I went to see the doctor about my short-term memory problems — the first thing he did was make me pay in advance.

I went to see the doctor about my short-term memory problems — the first thing he did was make me pay in advance.

You have two parts of the brain, “left” and “right” — in the left side, there’s nothing right and in the right side, there’s nothing left.

You have two parts of the brain, “left” and “right” — in the left side, there’s nothing right and in the right side, there’s nothing left.

Why do bees hum? They don’t remember the lyrics!

Why do bees hum? They don’t remember the lyrics!

I have a dog to provide me with unconditional love but I also have a cat to remind me that I don’t deserve it: it’s all about balance.

I have a dog to provide me with unconditional love but I also have a cat to remind me that I don’t deserve it: it’s all about balance.

Don’t spell part backward. It’s a trap.

Don’t spell part backward. It’s a trap.

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

Most people are shocked when they find out how bad I am as an electrician.

Most people are shocked when they find out how bad I am as an electrician.

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything.

Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything.

Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.

Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.

I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.

I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.
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